I saw About Time for the third time a moment ago. It’s midnight right here in Caloocan City, Philippines and I am not a bit sleepy. The movie is about a guy who can travel back into any day or time in his past, like his father and his grandfather and all the other males in their family.
The idea was that he could go back and change anything, but of course, there was the ripple effect that could change the woman he marries, the kid he has in the future, the life and death of someone he could affect and so on.
I thought about a moment in my past that I wish I could travel back in time to. There is quite a lot, actually, but the first two would be July 29, 2014 – right before my husband left the house, never to return to us alive again.
I would tell him not to leave, of course. I would smother him with kisses, hug him tightly…
The last day I saw my father, when I just visited mama and papa at home and he accompanied me outside. He lit a cigarette and bought pastries in this bakery near our home. I would have said sorry and told him how he was the best man I have ever known. And he truly is…
But then what would happen? What would be the ripple effect? I feel like I cherish everyday I am with my daughter to. How the tragedy of losing my husband brought me back closer to my mama. Would I give that up? I could find ways to patch things up with my family, but then again, if I could somehow change the past – the present and the future would be changed as well.
Accepting or Not Accepting Death
I understand how the main character in the story decided never to travel back in the past by the end of the movie. You see, there is really no need to it. You just have to hold on to the one you have and hold on to them tightly as if you’re always about to lose them. You #lovetheoneyourewith everyday, every second.
I miss my husband, Johnny and my Papa too. I miss them so much at time I want to rip my heart out and set it afire. But I understand the saying, “things happen for a reason,” more than ever.
What is the point to all this? I don’t know. You tell me.