It was the 24th, the day before Christmas.
Alone and lonely. Slightly trembling from too much coffee. My ashtray filled with cig butts. Didn’t notice that I emptied a pack.
I felt this urgent need to see Cecille and Vicky – my best friends. They were living in the same building now. Maybe I should move there as well.
I really needed to talk to them because I felt disappointed with the way my mom handled the news. But if I go to my friends right now, I would have to come clean about Danny and Bryan.
When did I get so hungry for attention?
Mom will always take Danny’s side and no one else’s. She can be so shameless sometimes. Wonder if she’d marry Danny should he proposed to her. Her telling me to stick with Dan has only made me feel rebellious.
Danny’s distant and cold. But he’s got all items checked on mom’s checklist for son in laws. Bryan on the other hand makes me feel wanted and desired but he’s a bartender who has women only contacts on his phone. But he deleted them in front me. He went down on his knees to say he’s sorry. And the way he holds me!
So many thoughts keep running around in my head. I suddenly decided to change into something nice. I left my apartment in a hurry and jumped in a cab. It was all driving me crazy.
It was around six in the morning and it was cold out. I was wearing a casual ensemble that consisted of a floral top with puffy sleeves, stone-washed bootleg jeans and a pair of velvet ballet flats.
To put them all together and to guard me for the cold, I wore a racy lopped leather jacket that Vicky gave to me as her Christmas present. It was something she knew I would want and she didn’t get it wrong. Vicky would be happy to see me in this jacket and Cecille always loved the company. So I didn’t think it was rude of me to drop by at this early hour.
We exchanged gifts like two nights before the party because we were together decorating the roof-top where Cecille and Marty had their engagement celebration.
This jacket was perfect… and it’s not only stylish but it has many new and unique features like round neckline, stylish front buttons and short length. It is really a good outfit for modern women and it made me look slimmer too. Whenever in doubt with matters in my life, I dressed up and it made me feel better automatically.
When all else fails, you focus on fashion.
I guess I fell asleep in the cab. I woke up more or less thirty minutes later when the taxi honked at a pedestrian who apparently crossed the street without looking.
“We’re almost there… good thing you woke up, miss.” The driver tried to engage me in a conversation but I was too dazed to answer.
“Good…” I muttered and yawned.
I checked my mobile as soon as I could see clearly. Marty had answered my text. Apparently Cecille was still asleep and so was Vicky. But he said I should come over anyway. I felt relieved. Thankfully Marty was up and I didn’t need to knock continuously outside the building like a poor little thing.
When we arrived at Vicky’s place another forty or forty-five minutes later, I saw Marty standing outside the side entrance.
“Hello!” I called out and waved. Marty immediately walked over. I had with me a big bag of goodies that I had bought for Ronnie’s kids. He took it from me and waited for me to settle the fare.
“How have you been?” He asked as we walked side by side back to the building. “I bet the girls will be thrilled to see you. The kids are still asleep… only Bryan and I are up making breakfast and you’re just in time.”
“Great… I’m doing great. A bit lonely at home though, so I thought I should drop by. And breakfast seems like what I need. I brought some candies for the kids… I hope it won’t ruin their teeth and some toys too. I shopped for these three days ago. I’ll give the grownups their presents tomorrow.” I replied and winked.
I was already cheered up with Marty’s company. He has been a dear friend of mine even if we were competitive back in high school. We both topped our classes and tried to beat one another in almost every exam, every report, etc.
“So tell me,” he spoke as soon as we stepped inside the elevator. “What’s the matter?”
“Nothing. Just feeling lonely with my mom away this Christmas and the New Year.” I lied perfectly. “I wanted to see Cecille’s kids and even bought them presents…”
“Kelly, I know you too well. I know when something’s up.”
I shrugged, “Nothing…”
He continued, “And don’t think and I didn’t notice how you and Danny were looking awkward and uneasy last night.”
Marty followed his statement with a hearty laugh that reverberated all over the elevator room.
I felt my ears getting red. “Was it that obvious? Now I feel even worse.”
I sighed in exasperation. Every single time! Every single conversation boils down to me and Danny.
“Something’s got you all worked up. So tell me what the problem is and I’ll listen. I’ll always listen to you Kell. You and Vicky are the closest thing to a family to me.”
Marty’s got that awkward smile again and my heart softens. What a dork. But a nice dork.
I ran my hands through my hair and thought about actually telling him.